is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
