Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
