I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
