Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
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all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
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I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
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