did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
