okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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