whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
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