I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Randomize
