I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
