okay pat passed out under dana's car
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
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