i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
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