so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
