I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
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