We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Randomize
