Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
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I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
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My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes