How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
