drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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