Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize