dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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