Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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