Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
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