Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
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