girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
