Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
