I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
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