We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
