I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
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