I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Randomize
