idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
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just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
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I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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