Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I would fuck him just for his dog
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
Randomize
