Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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