i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
