I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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