I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
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