he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
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