Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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