I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize
