This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Randomize
