if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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