My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
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