So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
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