your thong is hanging out like whoa
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
