I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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