This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
