oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
