just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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