Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
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