she looked like the bat from fern gully.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
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