Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
