I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
